I got the job and they wanted me to start immediately so I got up at 4:30 again today to get to the UES by 6:00. Luckily I have been given a reprieve, starting hour moved back to 7:30, meaning a 6:00 wake up. Will have to post more later (maybe much later as we are going away for a week starting Sunday to someplace warm and sunny).
Can say love the job so far, going to learn A Lot! yippee. And my feet are only slightly sore as I bought me some super powered New Balance sneaks Wednesday after they hired me.
Brain not functioning well due to spotty nights sleep, worrying about alarm clock not going off and oversleeping first day on job. Must sleep, blog later.
ahhh, I'm baking for hire!
A bientot,
Samantha
Yes, the Northeast got a goodly amount of snow. You may have seen the excited newscasters prattling on about how we were snowed in. NYC did get a foot or more in places and for New Yorkers that can be immobilizing. Luckily it fell on a weekend and the city had most of Sunday to clean it up before anyone had to go back to work. I am telling you this from the comfort of my own home as I am still unemployed and therefore had no work to get to this morning. It is very pretty however, the snow. It civilizes NYC for a spell until it starts melting and you get slush central. From the looks of the weather reports we will have a couple more days of the scenic stuff before the temperature warms up and it starts to dissolve.
I am indoors and was all day yesterday because when I did actually go prancing around in the romantic white stuff, (actually I was just walking the dog whose paws get salt in them and therefore needs to be carried, sigh) I managed to fall off the curb and sprain my right ankle. I have only done this to both of my ankles about a dozen times, each. I have very weak ankles and the repeated spraining just aggravates the condition. My flipping feet are a pain in the ^%#%$! I was just starting to think the left one (with the plantar fascitis) was all better when the bunion in the right one began acting up. Then I fall like a sack of potatoes and the right one is bunged up further. argh
The real reason I am annoyed (beyond being uncomfortable and feeling old) is that on Wednesday I am trailing at a bakery. I am very conscious now of what I write and the implications of said writing, so for the meantime I am going to refrain from using the actual names of anyone/thing. I think there is plenty for me to say without identifying anything in particular. As I mentioned previously I met with an old family friend who has a catering biz last week. Let's call her Martha (not Stewart!). Martha has a small empire on the upper east side: a bakery and two take out locations, one of which houses a small cafe. I think the bulk of her business is catering but she does well with the UES crowd who need their coffee and muffin/take out lunch salads etc. I know Marthas food, have eaten it at various points over the years (she catered my first wedding) although I have not had it in the past decade. Her flavors are true, her instincts are good, she melds things well. She cooks good. The part of this equation that excites me most however is her bakery.
It is a large affair without being industrial. It is on the first floor with the retail in the front and the business end behind it, with no separation. This means that the bakers are always on display. That fact is neither here nor there to me, but the concept that you can be baking on the ground floor with windows and a view of the outdoors is a beautiful thing. The ceiling is high, a good 12 feet and there are windows on two sides. Often food preparers, sweet and savory alike, are relegated to the back or below, no windows, low ceilings. In this case they get to work with natural light and some sense of the time of day and the weather. I have not cased the joint fully so cannot give you the total run down of equipment. There is a wall of ovens on the left, three perpendicular counters run down the center of the space, a large walk in in the back to the right. Various large mixers dot the perimeter and a couple of stand versions on the counters. I don't recall seeing a sheeter but I don't think this is a bakery that would have much call for that piece of machinery. It is, in Marthas own words, rustic fare. I take this to mean a traditional bakery menu: muffins, scones, cookies, crumb cakes, cupcakes, brownies and the like. They do only one kind of bread and that is a brioche that they make into rolls. Martha says she doesn't get many requests for bread, guess there are other places up there to go for bread (Eli's). She did say that if someone was interested in making bread that she would be open to experimenting. She is very receptive to trying new things out, said that things change subtly depending on who is working in the bakery.
I spoke for a bit with another baker about the style and approach of the bakery and he was telling me about a marble loaf that he was trying to perfect. It is a variation on the pound cake concept but he was trying to get it lighter in texture. Said that he was experimenting by varying the creaming of the butter and sugar to see if he could get different results. I love that idea, that he is playing with the chemistry of the recipe to see how he can manipulate his outcome, in a commercial setting. I am hooked. We got along very well, were talking about our cookbook collections and the alchemy of baking. Thinking that this may be a good place for me. I go and trail on Wednesday. Hopefully my ankle will be strong enough to make it through 8 hours by then. I iced it like crazy for the first 24 hours and the swelling is going down, so I think I will be ok.
It is a bit of a hike all the way up to the UES from Prospect Heights but I actually like the idea of riding the subway to work. I will have built in knitting time every day I work. Must say that I like knitting socks on the subway, it is different from doing any other kind of knitting underground. People are intrigued in a very human way and it breaks down all sorts of barriers, I usually end up having at least one conversation about knitting every time I bring socks on the train. Must be something about the porcupine affect of the 5 double point needles (yes, I still use dps, can't quite conquer the gap between needles with 2 circs) and the resulting tube that makes people curious.
Feeling good about this potential job. Was sending out resumes like a fiend and getting no response. I think that employers would look at my resume, see my lack of experience and go no further. I do much better in person, when someone can see my enthusiasm and commitment in person. As a faceless resume I fear I am undistinguishable. I just needed someone to let me in the door and then I will prove my stuff. Also feeling better about my decision to let the restaurant concept fall aside and focus more on bakeries. Really do think that I would like to spend some time learning all about bread, might try and work for Daniel Leader at Bread Alone up in Boiceville, after we move. But for now I will work hard on the sweet stuff, want to be proficient at all things muffin/scone/cookie/loaf cake/brownie/crumb cake etc.
A request was made for my wheat thins recipe, it is not actually mine, but from the King Arthur Flour bakers companion book, page 170. I will print it out here, but if you have the book, you've got the recipe. Also think you can probably find it online at the King Arthur Flour website, the recipe is called Thin Wheat Crackers.
yield 8 dozen
Ingredients:
4 1/4 oz unbleached AP or pastry flour
5 oz whole wheat flour
1 1/4 oz sesame seeds (I toast mine, 350 oven for 5 m)
1 3/4 oz sugar
1/2 tsp salt
4 tbl butter cold
1/2 cup milk
coarse salt
preheat oven 325
Combine flours, seeds, sugar, salt. Cut in butter (as for pastry). Stir in milk, adding just enough to make workable dough.
Divide dough into 3 or 4 pieces and roll each out (1 at a time) as thin as possible, try to get it to 1/16 of an inch. Sprinkle with the coarse salt if you like and roll it in with the rolling pin. Cut into any shape you like (best to use a pizza wheel or pastry cutter), transfer to baking sheet with parchment (or silpat) and bake for 20-25 m till they are lightly brown. Always rotate sheets in oven half way through cooking time to ensure even color and baking. Cool on a rack.
Eat and enjoy! Couldn't be easier, and you can modify flavors by exhanging flours and/or seeds, adding spices or herbs. Once you get the hang of it the possibilites are endless. Yum!
One last thing, a little rant I have been meaning to post for a while. What is the deal with the annoying saran wrap box these days? Don came home with this monstrosity that has a built in sliding cutting element. What a bloody pain in the ass! The old familiar serrated edge is gone and you have to stop and pay attention to where the little slidy thing is when you want to cut a piece of plastic wrap when your hands are full of dough and time is of the essence.....ugh! Don't you just think that this 'innovation' came about because some manual dexterity challenged idiot cut themselves on the old box and sued the company? Not only is the 'advancement' awkward (to say the least) but it allows them to make plastic wrap that is smaller in size and to charge you the same amount of money for half as much product! I hate corporate America. The dollar has become the moral imperative and nothing is considered off limits in the pursuit of it's worship.
There that's done, it's been bothering me for a couple of weeks now.
More after Wednesday.
A bientot,
Samantha
Strange as it may seem, this type of weather actually makes me long for the country. I like the cold barren landscape, find it very comforting for some reason...
Going to the Upper East Side to meet with an old family friend who runs a bakery/cafe/catering biz tomorrow. It would be a haul to get to work, but it would be good experience. I know how this woman works, the quality of her food and her temperment. It may not be cutting edge anything but it is good reliable delicious fare.
My current interest is crackers. Have made wheat thins and curry ginger versions to add to the hardtack in the repertoire. They are very easy and SO much tastier than store bought. Nice savory alternative to all the cookies I was making before Xmas.
Don is back and I am damn glad for it. A high school friend was on the Golden Globes the other night with her terribly talented husband who was up for ( but unfortunately did not recieve) an award. Strange to see people you know on TV.
Trying to find the perfect yarn for my sockapalooza mate. Can't seem to find the color I am looking for, may have to revise my plans. In the meantime, finished a pair for Don and am half way through a pair for myself. Wish I had mine done already as could really use them in this cold...
Maybe I should be a sheep farmer.....
A bientot,
Samantha
I have been discovered by a former employer, one who I did not say nice things about. Reading her response was painful, though deserved. Not because I lied about her, but because I spoke about her in a place where she had no (previous) opportunity to respond. I was wrong to post such personal material.
I am embarassed. I have read about others who have crossed lines and gotten in to trouble, I think we all have. I am uncertain of how to react. I know now that she will read every post and look for any possible way to discredit me. Also know she will tell others we know mutually in the business.
My first instinct is to run and hide. Pull the blog down and disappear. But I cannot do that, not truly, because some things that are said can not be unsaid. Even if I went silent running what I have already said would be there in the ether. Not to mention ringing in others ears(eyes?). I will leave her comment up for others to hear her voice and to remind me that I need to be respectful in what I post.
The ironic thing is that I had lunch with someone (names will be withheld until further notice) and we were talking about the food world and I was feeling queasy. Remembered that the whole reason I went into this business was to get away from NYC, and somehow I feel like I am getting sucked into the mindset that I need to be here, need to work in some big deal NY restaurant. Realistically speaking if I had wanted to a job that had lots of stress and tension I could have stayed at the magazine, made much more money and had kick butt benefits. I quit that to have a less stressful more meaningful life. Need to remember the plan. When Don came back from London we talked about maybe just putting the plan into action, putting the apt on the market and getting out of the city on whatever timetable that creates. Neither of us really wants to be here anymore. I can certainly get experience out of the city, NY is not the only place in the world where good baking is done. And I am truly not just saying this because I got a tongue lashing. I was going to post about this already when I found her comment.
Spent most of the day yesterday baking cookies and crackers for Staceyjoys opening (which has now been postponed) and love the baking process. I think I should be doing that someplace quietly with someone else dealing with the customers. I have always been good at putting my foot in my mouth, anyone who knows me has seen or heard me do it repeatedly. I should be hidden away in the back with the hobart and the bags of flour.
KNITTING CONTENT
(perhaps this is the way for me to get my blogging jones and not offend any, by posting about my knitting)
I have not started on my sockapalooza socks. Partly because I know I can make a pair of socks in a couple of days (at my current rate) but also because I have not found the right yarn yet. In my head it is lime green or chartreuse and I have not found any sock yarn that is that color yet. My giftees preferences tell me that these colors would be well received, not that those were her only choices, but from blog research I gather it would go over well. Still uncertain of the form the socks will take, varigation is not her bag, so I am considering stripes, or some texture... So many choices but am thinking the yarn will inspire the form it should take.
In the meantime I am almost finished with socks for Don, my first pair of many to come for him. The yarn is a self patterning fair isle type blue/green combo from Elann. They are knitting up on #1s and he has big beautiful feet so it is taking me a little longer than usual. I use Ann Budds pattern from her Handy Book of Patterns, so I am not short rowing my heels, but everyone else online seems to be. My next pair, which will probably be for me with some merino/spandex green and gold variegated I got at School Products, I will try the Priscilla Gibson-Roberts short row sock from her Simple Socks book. I love socks because they are fast and gratifying. Concurrently working on an Aran, the Cameron pullover from A Season's Tale (Kim Hargraves/Rowan), in a gorgeous green Rowanspun Aran for Don. As he has a big body to match those big beautiful feet it is slightly slower going than the socks.
Must take yoga to calm my jittery a^$#%$ down
A bientot,
Samantha
This will make NO sense to those of you who have found me through a curiosity for anything pastry. While it may be hard to believe, there are moments in my day when I am not baking or even thinking about it. I am a truly artsy craftsy type of girl. Previous to my pastryelf incarnation I expressed myself through other similarly creative mediums. When younger (much) I was a modern dancer (yes, I even got paid, though not much). Then for many years (and hopefully for some more in the future) I was a photographer. Along the way there were also years of intensive gardening (another interest I hope to pursue more in the future, in the Upper Hudson Valley?) which led to canning and preserving. Concurrently there were also (lean) years when I sewed, made many of my own clothes, partly out of need and partly out of self expression.
Then I re-discovered knitting. I was taught by a series of Danish Au Pair girls my parents employed to take care of myself and my sister when we were kids. They would knit and crochet clothes for our dolls. I picked it up pretty easily. My Mother knit, although for some reason I don't remember her teaching me. I was taught continental, wasn't aware it was odd except that my Mother knit English which was different and therefore somehow not helpful. Can't say that I did tons of knitting when I was younger. Remember thinking that yarn was expensive and somehow my allowance just wouldn't cover the costs. We did have a beautiful yarn store literally two doors down from my home growing up. When I think back on that one I wince. So close and yet so unappreciated. This was the 70's, many, many years before knitting would become cool again. I remember one grossly mishapen turtleneck in a blue wool that was way too chunky for the design that I think I wore once.
I did knit all the pieces of a purple wool/mohair cable sweater from a Vogue pattern that never got sewn together and I imagine got thrown away when my Mother made one of her moves. I was so proud of all those cables but was horribly intimidated by the sewing up process. The Danish women were only there for the beginning of my knitting education, I wish they had been available for consultation when I got to the constructing phase. For many years I was intimidated by the concept of sewing together. I think the last thing I knit before my hiatus was a vest for my Mother that had many stitch patterns, so many that I think I lost my focus. It was in a paper shopping bag I am sure also got thrown away in a move. sigh.
So that was about the end of college, when I gave it up. I was dancing then and really not making much money, anything I had to spare was spent on nights out (give me a break I was in my 20's, what do you expect). Life happened. I quit dancing, took up photography, got married (yikes) and got lost. There is about 10 years there where I'm not sure what happened to me. My first marriage was not too successful. All my creative energies went into gardening and sewing. Unfortunately there were days when I would hide from husband by sewing. I had my own room set up with a machine, my ironing board and lots 'o fabric. (stashing is not limited to knitting, my friends) I would sew when I wasn't in the garden, anything to distract me from my sad marital state. No violins here, not looking for pity/sympathy, just explaining the strength of my creative juices.
I am a twitch, I cannot sit still and vegetate. I must have a project going at all times. Often those projects have been an escape or a distraction from something I find unpleasant and do not want to deal with in my life. Sometimes it's as banal a problem as not wanting to clean the house or call my parents. As I have gotten older, and some what better at dealing with life, I have relaxed and given myself over to my obsessions, they are part of who I am. So there are dust bunnies, but look at this sock! I think that baking is a good match for my creative and commercial (read, income producing) sides. I don't think there is a huge stretch between the process of making cookies and making a sweater. Cookies are faster, more instant gratification, but they both involve gathering elements, mixing them up and, with manipulation, creating something new.
I took up the knitting again at the end of the marriage. We lived within reasonable driving distance of the original Patternworks. I don't remember what got me going, I certainly didn't have the pocket change. Loved going to Patternworks and wandering around pawing the yarn, drooling. Made myself a scarf, basic broken rib with some cheap chenille. Then I got it into my head that if I made the husband a sweater I could get away with spending money on yarn. Made him a Penny Straker pullover, very simple garter stitch crew neck. Black yarn, something with wool and maybe rayon. Very safe, middle of the road. He actually wore the thing, it came out ok considering all the angst that went into it. A couple of months later I left him. What's that saying about the boyfriend sweater? It applies to husbands too, right? It was a healthy move, bolstered, I think, by my taking up the knitting needles again. Knitting was a little piece of me from my long lost childhood that I could find solace in. It was a connecting thread, something from my past that I could bring to my present. It gave me validation, I was the same person who loved to knit as a child, regardless of the strange path I had taken after. It gave me strength, which I was sorely in need of at that point. This is a serious whitewash, but some things are really too personal.
So I picked up the needles and started knitting again. This was still before it became cool. There was a vibrant underground, lots of information if you looked for it, but no knitblogs. I knew how to knit and purl, I could handle a cable needle, but had never broached the whole circular concept. I was not surrounded by knitters, found myself shy at yarn stores (partially out of a feeling of guilt about not spending enough money on yarn, go figure), so I read, voraciously, anything I could get my hands on. I tried circular knitting. Bought a book of hats, Hat's On! by Charlene Scurch. Made many two colored vaguely Scandinavian hats. Some were more successful than others, but I learned. Knit my way through my divorce. Would spend entire weekends knitting, save for the time spent at yoga or feeding myself. Fold myself into my favorite black chair, (found by the side of the road upstate) Aimee Mann in the cd player and just knit. It was therapeutic, something I could wrestle with constructively. It was very private,(even though I was usually knitting for others) it was mine to accomplish, regardless of the blood/sweat/tears it might take out of me.
I don't remember when I decided to tackle the constuction issue, but somewhere along the line I felt confident enough to try my hand at a sweater. Maybe it was for a child? Maybe not, maybe it was the ribbed turtleneck in Classic Elite Waterspun. The point is that I crossed that bridge. Now I make sweaters, hats, socks, gloves, baby booties, blankets and even working on a dog sweater. I found the knitblog community and am an avid reader. Discovered ebay and have a huge stash. Met a fabulous man online and got married again. He likes it that I knit, calls it my colored string, encourages my stash building activity, will actually come into a yarn store with me and give opinions. Secretly think that knitting helped me find myself enough to make a real connection with another healthy human being.
And the point here? Well, it may be a little anti-climactic but I have joined a knitalong (if I was computer adept, here is where I would link to the site). I am going to knit socks for someone I don't know and send them along to them. Someone else out there in the world is going to do the same for me. My site has been linked on the blog of the person organizing the sockapalooza
http://alison.knitsmiths.us/index.html
and I am thinking that I may have some knitting traffic, and that they may be wholly confused as to why they have found a foodblog. So I am explaining my knitting self so that at least the person who draws my name in the sockalong pool can read something about my knitting and get some inspiration to knit me socks. It may be pollyanna but I love the idea of knitting socks for someone I don't know, yet, and sending those socks out into the universe. Making something positive for this world.
So that's my story.....
more food coming, I promise, think I'm going to make some cookies this rainy afternoon
a bientot,
Samantha
Our dinner was a success.
The final menu:
hors d'oeuvres made by Don that included small bites of cucumber with whitefish, apples and sour cream, pumpernickel rounds covered with roasted red peppers and boursin.
first course was a carrot soup with dill and port.
main course was a pork loin crusted with garlic, rosemary, sugar and cayenne, served with garlic rosemary roasted potatoes and braised fennel.
There was an intermezzo of Dons hot chocolate.
And the meal finished with espresso profiteroles with cinnamon ice cream and a grand marnier chocolate sauce.
also on the table was a macadamia brittle.
It was quite a feast. The guest list stretched to 10 total and, other than fennel that didn't cook as quickly as I would have liked, the whole thing went off without a hitch. I am getting better at this cooking thing. It's all about preparation, making a game plan and spreading out your cooking to maximize your time. You don't want to get stuck with too much last minute cooking that interferes with your socializing. Mise en place is also important, assembling all your ingredients within reach before you start cooking is a crucial element that expedites the process. I had a great time. Still know that my choice of pastry was the right one, wouldn't want to be on the line making food to order in the heat. But in the comfort of my own home for friends/family I enjoy cooking. Making the cream puffs for the profiteroles, which was done two days before the meal, was exciting. I have made pate a choux (the batter for cream puffs) in school and at work, but never at home. I was pleased with the results. My piping could use some more polishing, nothing like some practice for that. The ice cream was also home made, and good, although I think my little $50 Cuisinart churn does not turn out truly creamy product. It always feels just a little too much texture for my liking, even with different recipes. The brittle is much better with pistachios but I was out and couldn't find any within a short walk, so I tried it with Macadamias. Umm, well, nothing special. Guess I'm not a Macadamia fan.
Don is in the UK for work and I have realized that I do not really cook for myself. I made myself a big ol' pot of chicken soup with rice and escarole and have been eating from that. Not particularly exciting but filling. Also made curry ginger crackers which are quite tasty, if a shred spicy, as nibbling food. I am a nibbler, like to munch small bits over the day, not great with the sit down and eat three meals a day concept. But not having someone else around to cook for quells my cooking urges. This fact makes sense, however, in my decision to make a career of baking at this stage in my life. My baking interests are about feeding others, not about satisfying my own sweet tooth. Until recently I didn't really even have a sweet tooth. I am much more of a salty or sour person. I must admit now to having developed a penchant for sweets. After I finish a savory meal I feel the desire for something sweet. I am not thinking a pint of Haagen Daz or a slice of layer cake. But a little nubbin of sugar seems a fitting end to most meals, the flavor is the perfect complement to the savory experience.
Since the new year I have run into Karen a number of times in the building. After never running into her before I worked for her (or before she had her baby) I have now seen her in the laundry room and the lobby. Her baby is adorable and she looks rested and calm, motherhood seems to agree with her. I read a couple of weeks back in the NYT that Craftbar is moving around the corner to the old Morells Wine bar location. Currently all the desserts for both Craft and Craftbar are made and served from one kitchen. When the 'bar moves around the corner this will have to change. I brought this up with her when I saw her and she said that she was going to need to hire more people for the change. I told her I would love to work for her and from the response I got, I believe she would hire me, but she did warn that this would not be happening until the end of February/beginning of March. She also mentioned that 'Wichcraft is opening a commissary kitchen in a project that will be built in what used to be the disco The Tunnell, and that she will need bodies there. Why does it seem like everything I would like to do is sometime in the future?
It is January and I have not heard anything from Aumont at the Modern. I am wondering if I should go there some afternoon between service and see if I can jog his memory about our conversation. Not sure how persistent I should be, feeling cautious after the Sullivan Street situation. Know that the mid level restaurant is just opening to the public now, so he is probably up to his eyeballs in start up. Don't want to be a pest.
Left a resume at Ici in Fort Greene on Tuesday, they are looking for a pastry assistant. It is a tiny place but it might be a good place to get some experience while I am waiting for Craftbar to open.
Don't know anymore if I am dreaming about this career. Settling into this unemployed thing a little too soundly. Feel isolated and insecure about my skills, wondering why I am not working, and if there is something wrong with my timing, my choices, my motivation. Felt like I had some momentum going last Fall but now feel cut off. Karen was very complimentary, said that I was very hireable and should have no trouble finding work. Must remember I am being picky and that I should have faith, it will work out.
Must go feed dog, being temporarily single parent, I am the center of his universe. It is exhausting. Don't know how parents do that whole child rearing thing. I would collapse in a heap.
A bientot,
Samantha